I was thinking about something I used to do when ordering something not so healthy at a fast-food restaurant. I’d be like “Can we please have the…”. Can “we”... WE? I was the ONLY person in the vehicle at the time yet, I would continuously refer to myself in the plural. Why? Because I was ashamed that I was ordering something “bad for me” and I wanted to pretend it was for someone else. I guess it was my hope that the person serving me would be less likely to judge me, if I was ordering for a party of more than just one. I was playing mindtricks…on my own mind. BUT, that’s where I was in my life. These were the things I’d do.
I remember another time I stopped in to the supermarket to fix my coconut cream pie craving. The lady at the cash asked me if I’d like her to put the pie in a separate bag so that it wouldn’t get squat. I replied with, “Nah, the guys will still eat it in any shape or form”…Whaaaaaaaaaat? The guys to which I referred were non-existent. This pie was mine. ALL MINE. So, why did I feel it necessary to lie to this woman? This individual I would likely never see again warranted a lie as stupid as making up a team of pie eaters? A simple, “no thanks” certainly would have sufficed.
Why did I do that? Body Image and fear of judgment.
I hated the way I looked back then and to be perfectly honest, I am not in-love with current self quite yet, although I am very close to getting there. I have weight left to lose and am sometimes hung up on that. But, I’m trying to pick the positive out of it. Focusing on how far I have come, not how far I have left to go.
But, back to body image.
Body perfection is based on airbrushed standards perpetuated by photo editing software.
We look at magazines and see these beautiful, perfect people and sometimes it makes us feel bad about ourselves. I have come a long way in the self confidence department BUT, I do find it a challenge at times. Even when I see those “plus sized” (#PlusNOTPlusSize) models I’m thinking, but she doesn’t have muffin top or stretch marks or cellulite…but, SHE DOES! It’s just hidden.
Hidden behind a graphic artist’s brush stroke.
I’ve been trying to stop comparing myself to other people and am just concentrating on me. It’s incredibly important to my mental health and sanity to do so but, I don’t always make it a priority and know others are in the same boat. Despite what we think, stretch marks, cellulite and muffin top are NOT a banner announcing ugliness, they’re metaphysical processes occurring in our body. SCIENCE! Just like bigger biceps, toned thighs and flat abs…it’s all comes down to the atom. So, why is the science of cellulite any different than the science of a six pack?
My point? We need to focus on the positive.
Next time you get out of the shower, stand in front of your full-length mirror clothing free. But, instead of honing in on your “flaws” pick out the things you love. Is it your shapely legs? Your beautiful hair? Your sparkling eyes? Come on, do it…pick out the things you love. Then, I challenge you to focus on those things instead of parts of you that you feel are “ugly”.
We may not be able to change the outlook of the world as a whole but, we can change our own outlook on the world. Why can’t this outlook be positive? Why can’t it be loving toward ourselves?
Go on…Love yourself. You have YOU for life.